Park (Elizabeth and Andrew)

[Elizabeth Hanson]

Breaking up is hard to do~

Whoever sang that was so very right; she and Andrew had been together for years! How did this happen? How did something that use to be so good end like this? Elizabeth didn't hate him but the breakup was definitely taking a toll on her. Her family history of depression made her cautious about spending too much time at home crying over their break up. She'd given herself two days to just stay in bed and sob and well she was slowly getting back into her old routine. She always jogged in the park.

She loved how it made her feel afterwards; it was a satisfaction that she couldn't describe but this morning was different. Was that Andrew? Shit. She wanted to run in the opposite direction but her little poodle, Cinnamon had already spotted him and was barking like a little overly excited devil. She reluctantly stepped to his side, "Hey Tuxxie...." Was it awkward to use that nickname? Probably. Wow. She would be Elizabeth Tuxon if they'd stayed together, her eyes drifted down to her empty ring finger and she felt a pang in her chest.

"How are things?" She was trying hard not to let the sadness show on her face but hiding it was impossible. There was still so much heartbreak in her eyes.

[Andrew Tuxon]

Andrew was jogging in his usual work out attire - basketball shorts, an Underarmor tank top, and Nike Freeruns. He had a band around his arm with his iPod in it, the ear buds shoved in his ears. He saw Beth a while before she actually said something to him - but he was definitely not going to be the one to make contact first. Things were still.. raw. The trust issues and all just made things hard on the couple, and that's essentially why they broke off their engagement. Yeah, they were a sweet couple and happy for the most part - But you really can't have anything without trust, right?

He took the earbuds out of his ears and ran a hand through his dark hair. "Oh, hey Beth.." Tuxxie. That sent shivers up and down his spine. Andrew missed hearing her voice saying his name. Why did he ever lose her? She was beautiful - even if she was jogging. He shook the thoughts from his head. "I'm doin' alright. Still breathing, so I can't really complain," He chuckled, raising an arm to scratch the back of his neck nervously. Hopefully she didn't remember any of his little ticks like that. She probably did. Fuck. He wasn't going to win this one.

"What about you?"

[Elizabeth Hanson]

Elizabeth remembered everything about him; you don't just forget those things after being so close to someone. She hated that their trust issues kept them from being able to take the plunge but she would have been ready if she thought that he was and she didn't. She didn't think that he was ready and the details of the night that they broke up were blurry but she did remember staying up all night crying over what could have been. She cried after she returned the ring to him, too. It didn't matter though because those were all tears that he'd never see, promises that wouldn't be kept and vows that would never be said. What if they'd gotten married? Would they be happy or miserable? Was their breakup somehow for the best?

Maybe.

It was questions like those that would never be answered.

"I've.....been better but I'm getting there. I started a new job recently which is cool and I have all new clients who I already love." She was trying not to sound as nervous as she was, she wanted nothing more than to go back and be engaged again. Just so she could kiss him one last time, feel his warm embrace after a tough day at work..... No! Bad!

[Andrew Tuxon]

God, she was beautiful. Andrew was so busy watching her talk, seeing the way her lips moved, the way her eyes darted around occasionally, the way she fidgeted with the dog's leash -- Deep down, he felt regret. He felt the feeling you get when you miss someone. It hurt to admit it, but Andrew did miss Beth. They were so.. happy when they were together.

But that was the past. They couldn't be happy now.

Could they?

"Oh..." Andrew said, trying to figure out what to say since he has kind of missed everythin she said while watching her. Honestly, it felt a little creepy as he thought about what he was doing, studying what she was doing. "That's good. I work at the gym - personal trainer. No biggie," He shrugged, trying to make things less awkward than they were. He tried to resist temptation of what he was about to do, but could, and gave in. "Do you want to go get some breakfast or something, Beth?" Andrew looked down, feeling nervous again.

[Elizabeth Hanson]

Breakfast? Was that okay? Were they suppose to do that? Elizabeth was trying not to think too hard about this so she decided to just take this mini plunge and go to breakfast with Andrew even if he was her ex-fiance. She took one of his hands in her's, "For safety." She was lying and it was obvious. She was clinging to what little human contact that she could receive from him. She couldn't kiss him, hug him, anything and this was just going to have to do for now.

Why couldn't they be happy?

Why did things always have to be so hard for them? She just couldn't stand it that they were broken up! She missed him but it was too late, wasn't it? She wanted to ask him if there was somebody else but all she could manage was a lame question, "Where do you want to eat? That little cafe we use to....." She stopped short and frowned, how awkward would that be? They use to get breakfast there every morning.

[Andrew Tuxon]

Andrew's stomach fluttered when Elizabeth took his hand. I thought only girls got butterflies.. Why can't I feel my knees? Am I dying right now? Andrew tried to focus on breathing so he wouldn't freak himself out. He felt like a kid in 9th grade again, going on his first date, not knowing what to expect, or what to do. Being around Beth again was so surreal, and a painful reminder of what they used to have.

"Um.." Andrew said. Man, he'd used that word too many times today already. What was this girl doing to him? "I guess we could go there. I mean if you want to. I was thinking something more like Denny's but whatever you want is fine."

Wouldn't going to "their" cafe be.. weird? What if the waitress thought they had gotten back together, and drew a heart in his latte like she used to? What if they made sure he and Beth sat at their table? Heart shaped pancakes with bacon arrows would just be awkward right now.

[Elizabeth Hanson]

"Remember the first time that we went to the cafe?" Elizabeth asked suddenly; she didn't know how he could possibly forget. "It was raining so hard that day.... I just remember thinking that we were going to catch pneumonia out in the cold like that but I didn't care because I was with you." She felt strange saying that because she knew how things ended. Those feelings she had back then were so strong that she couldn't imagine a life without him and now she had to live it. She couldn't just sit around and cry all day over their failed relationship.

"Denny's might be best." She didn't realize that she was frowning until she caught her reflection in a puddle. "I think we should be friends, Tuxx---Andrew." She didn't know why but the words slipped out and continued like word vomit. No. This was worse than vomit.

Word diarrhea.

"We were always better as friends anyway."

[Andrew Tuxon]

"Yeah, we only went in there cuz everywhere else was full or scummy," Andrew remembered, chuckling. That was probably the day Andrew really realized his true feelings for Beth. He had known there were feelings there for quite a while, but that day, he found out the extent of those feelings. Love, in short, was that feeling.

"Oh, Denny's. Yeah, sounds good to me. Um, should we catch a cab?" He suggested and walled towards the street to hail a cab unless Beth had a different idea.

"Friends?" That hit Andrew like a ton of bricks. They hadn't been friends pretty much ever. They met, had sex, had more sex, and somewhere in there fell in love, and then out again. being 'friends' had never been an option.

[Elizabeth Hanson]

"Yeah friends like two people who hang out and have fun and keep their clothes on." Elizabeth didn't really know how to explain it differently so she just left it at that; he knew what friends were. "Can we pretend that we never dated and never got engaged? I miss you and I want to talk to you but I know that we weren't meant to be now so why not just pretend that it never happened? It'd make things so much less complicated!"

She nodded at his suggestion that they take a cab and kept her grip on his hand as they were walking. She wasn't ready to let go just yet after all. "I just think it'd be for the best." Did she want to forget their entire romantic history? Not so much.

But.... She did miss him and they weren't meant to be so why remember? Why live with that hurt forever?

[Andrew Tuxon]

Pretend it never happened? How do you do that? For Andrew, even being around Esme was difficult. And that was nine years ago. He of all people wasn't one to forget such significant things in life. "You know.. Beth," Andrew sighed as the cab pulled up to Denny's. They were seated at a small table set for two and given menus. The waitress brought coffee and cream and left the two to converse and decide what to order.

"You know we've never been friends, ba -- Beth." Baby was not the right name to use in this conversation. "I just.. I"m not sure where we stand right now, but ... I'm really glad we ran into each other." Maybe this little meeting would mend things? Maybe after this, they could be together again.

Maybe.

Hopefully.

[Elizabeth Hanson]

Elizabeth was trying really hard not to be awkward about this whole thing. She was hanging out with her ex-fiance for god's sake! She had ran into someone that she knew who took her darling dog from them so they were free to go to Denny's. She wasn't actually sure if it was a good idea to go to breakfast with him after everything that had happened. Did this mean that he still loved her? Did he want her back?

She honestly didn't know if she wanted him back; she loved him but were they ready? Were they ever really ready?

"Me too, poogy-bear.... I mean Andrew." She was embarrassed by her slip up but it was bound to happen... This felt so much like the old days. "I don't know where I want to be with you, you know? I wish it was different."

[Andrew Tuxon]

Andrew sighed. This was so complicated. Why didn't he just say hello and continue running? Why decide to go out to dinner with your ex, thinking no feelings would return? What made you think this would be easy? "Beth.." Andrew said, his voice trailing off as he racked his brain for the right way to word what he was going to say. "Have.. Have you ever..." He tried to form the sentence, but couldn't quite bring himself to actually let the words roll off of his tongue.

"Have you ever thought of trying again? Like, us?" There it was. Word vomit. He just blurted it out, and couldn't take it back. Andrew found something really interesting on the menu. His eyes were glued to it. I mean, there was nothing more distracting than bacon pancakes, right? He could stare at them for an unusual amount of time, right? He definitely wasn't avoiding Elizabeth's eyes, due to the awkward question. Definitely not.

[Serena Adams]

"Have you ever thought of trying again? Like, us?"

His words stirred something up in Elizabeth and she wanted to leap up from her seat and immediately get into a cab so she could be far far away from him and her feelings but that wouldn't make things better, would it? She would still have feelings for him; she would just be farther away. "I---I----"

"I think about you all of the time."

"I never wanted to break up, Andrew. I didn't want to lose you so yeah I have thought about trying us again. I think about you in the morning when I wake up to nobody, in the evening when I come home to an empty apartment and at night when I cry myself to sleep." She wasn't lying.

She missed him more than she ever imagined possible. "Do you?"

[Andrew Tuxon]

Now the hard part. Be the big tough guy and play it off like you don't think about her pretty much every day, or be honest Andrew and tell her the truth? Tell her you think of her at least twice a day, tell her you miss going to breakfast every day, tell her that seeing that ring every single morning when you brush your teeth absolutely kills you. But Andrew, you won't will you? You don't want her to know your weakness. You don't want to trust her. When she knows what hurts you, she'll use it against you. She'll leave you just like your mother did. Won't she?

"I.. um.." Andrew tried to fight the voice in his head, tried to push it away. "I do think about it, not all the time, but I do. I mean, I have before." Tough guy? Wrong choice, Andrew, the angel on his right shoulder told him. No, good job! Don't let her hurt you, play hard to get! Don't let her know you miss her, you pansy!, the devil on his left shoulder told him.

Why was this so difficult?

Why couldn't he just tell her, he missed her, he wished he could trust her and have kept their engagement. Four months later, would they have been married? Would they be picking out the napkin colors and the menu? What would they be doing?

[Elizabeth Hanson]

Elizabeth knew logically that he put a wall up to keep himself from getting hurt but logic was lost on her at this point. Didn't she study this type of person in college? The physiological affects of parental abandonment? She forced herself to take a drink of her coffee but it was bitter.... Just like her view on love after they broke up. He couldn't trust her not to hurt him and that hurt her because he had absolutely no reason not to believe in her.

She gave him no reason for this distrust!

"Are you happy that we didn't get married, Andrew?"

Why did she have to ask that? Of all the things that she could possibly ask? She was ashamed that she had asked because she knew that it was an uncomfortable question but it needed to be said. She couldn't just have him never tell her.

She needed to know if hanging onto him and the idea of them was hopeless or not.