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Post by Esme Russel on Sept 5, 2012 22:08:50 GMT -5
It seemed like Esme was doing wonderfully on her own - her apartment was cute and quint for her small family the way that it was, just her, Cici, the dogs and their new little kitty friend. Esme took the adorable furball from Jonathan and placed her on the ground so she could properly explore her environment and so the dogs could sniff her which they were rather excited about the opportunity to do; the kitten didn't seem to mind too terribly.
"I'm doing.... I'm doing alright. Did you know that I'm pregnant? I went to the doctor last week and I'm four weeks along." She let out a heavy sigh before placing a hand over her flat stomach, "I'm separated from my husband and I'm having his baby. I should be celebrating my pregnancy and instead I'm just sad and considering an abortion." She could trust Jonathan with that information.
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Post by Jonathan Russel on Sept 5, 2012 22:36:44 GMT -5
Pregnant? Jon almost lifted his hand to place on Esme's stomach, though he figured that would be weird considering that it wasn't his baby she was pregnant with this time, and also she just mentioned the word 'abortion'.
"You're pregnant?" Jon scrunched his eyebrows together, "Does... does he know? Have you told him?" Surely she hasn't told him; Hudson wouldn't have let her leave their home knowing she was pregnant with his baby, right? He wasn't like that. Reaching over to touch her arm, Jon sighed, "Don't talk like that." he shook his head, "Isn't this baby what you wanted in the first place?" Jon hated to see Esme upset, maybe it was some sort of habit of his, but when she was sad, it made him sad. It was one of those best-friend instincts. He'd been around her so much for so long, it was kind of just a thing, "You wouldn't want to give up on that."
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Post by Esme Russel on Sept 5, 2012 22:50:06 GMT -5
"I have an appointment at the clinic next weekend so I'll be officially five weeks along, I have to get it done by twelve weeks or it's too late." Esme was full of conflicting feelings on the matter of having another baby or not. She let out a heavy sigh and placed one of his hands over her stomach. "It's weird telling you that I'm pregnant because I always imagined that my next baby would be your's."
She felt like it was perfectly fine to be honest. She held one of his hands and looked to Cici and the kitten, "She loves that cat, you know? She was asking for a kitten earlier and it is so amazing that you bought one for her." She felt like Cici didn't get enough happiness in her life.
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Post by Jonathan Russel on Sept 7, 2012 19:20:09 GMT -5
Jon nodded, chuckling in agreement. He always thought they'd be having little Jonathan and Esmes running around after Cici. After you have one child with someone, you just sort of picture a whole entire family with them, you know? Or at least, that's how Jon saw it. He squeezed her hand, gently, "Are you going alone?" he raised an eyebrow in concern.
Looking down to admire the sight of Cici with the kitten he'd gotten her, he smiled, "I'm glad," he breathed in, "It doesn't always feel like enough, you know? The time I spend with her, the things I give to her -- I want to be a good dad," he averted his eyes back up to meet Esme's, "I mean, after all, she already has an amazing mom."
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Post by Esme Russel on Sept 7, 2012 19:35:12 GMT -5
she already has an amazing mom
Esme loved it when people told her that she was a good mother; she just always felt like she didn't do enough to keep her from all sorts of hurt so hearing it from someone else made it feel like she wasn't so bad after all. How could she not believe it when it was coming from someone like Jonathan? "I'm not going alone... I think I'll have someone come with me." She loved that he cared.
Hearing him saying that he didn't feel like what he did was enough was something that she could relate to. She wanted to tell him what a fantastic father that he was but she didn't know how to phrase it. "Cici loves you, Jon, you're her daddy and nobody can ever replace that not Hudson, not Mark, nobody. You're daddy and that makes you a superhero. Who taught her to ride a bike? Who does she run to when she gets a skinned knee or someone hurts her feelings? You're always good enough to her even if it doesn't feel like you are. She will never be disappointed as long as you're there for her when she needs you."
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Post by Jonathan Russel on Sept 7, 2012 21:59:47 GMT -5
Jon pulled Esme into a hug. When they'd broken up in high school, he really wasn't too sure how close they'd be, and seeing how they were now, he was glad that they weren't like typical separated parents. And besides, it's not like Cici was around when they were together, so she wouldn't miss having them together... unless, for some reason, fetuses could see things from the womb...
"You know what? I think we did good," Jon looked back at Cici again, "As parents. I mean, seeing as we had her in high school," he half-laughed, "I'd say we earned ourselves a trophy. Super parents."
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Post by Esme Russel on Sept 7, 2012 22:22:51 GMT -5
"We did really good considering especially knowing that she should have had a sister." Esme murmured in the saddest tone ever; they'd done the testing on the fetus to find out the cause of the miscarriage and all they found was that it would've been a girl which wasn't as comforting as one would expect. She gave him another hug - longer this time since she felt like she needed the comforting of a nice warm embrace.
She kept looking down to her ringless finger and sighing because it just looked so naked. She'd been wearing her rings for so long that she forgot what it felt like to not be wearing them. "Jonathan, do you think that he loves me? Hudson, I mean.... You're a guy so I mean you know how guys think and do you think that he loved me?" She knew that it was strange to ask him given their history but she needed to know.
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Post by Cooper Reynolds on Sept 10, 2012 6:22:45 GMT -5
Cooper didn’t exactly get along with his sister these days but his darling little Ci as he called her was sick and that meant that he needed to be there for her. So, he was heading down to see her and his young niece. He wasn’t just going for a visit, unfortunately, he also came with horrible news regarding their father. He didn’t know how that she was going to react especially when he informed her that the rest of the family had known for months that this was coming. They hadn’t hidden this because they wanted to leave her out! How were they suppose to drop this bombshell on the one person who never lost faith in the man especially with everything going on in her personal life with her separation from her husband and her daughter getting sick which thankfully she was getting better now.
His life right now was surprisingly uncomplicated even though he was a drug dealer and all. He'd never felt more normal! He knew that it was horrible to think this but he was glad that Esme was finally having to gain some independence. She was always so dependent on other people whether it was their father, him, Jonathan or Hudson and now she was doing it on her own. She was living in such a cute place, too! He couldn't believe his eyes when he saw the building that she was living in since it was just so cozy looking and well un-Esme like compared to the 4,000 dollar a month apartment that she'd been living in with Hudson.
How did Hudson manage to get her to leave him anyway? She loved that apartment which anyone who knew her would know since she was always talking about how happy that she was to live somewhere so luxurious and how she would never ever downgrade to something well something like what she was living in now. He wasn’t going to ask too many questions so he knew that the ones running through his head right now would remain forever unanswered. He just needed to see Cici and let Esme know that their father wasn’t expected to live longer than six months at the most.
No biggie.
Well at least he was trying to think of it as no biggie but it kind of was a biggie since she was a definite daddy's girl even though she was an adult and well a mother herself. He let out a heavy sigh before knocking on the door. He couldn't hear anything on the other end at first aside from the television. She was watching Baby Mama from the sound of it.
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Post by Esme Russel on Sept 10, 2012 6:47:50 GMT -5
Esme hadn’t been expecting any company but she certainly wasn’t complaining! She was honestly lonely since the separation from Hudson and she couldn't just call Jonathan every single time that she needed someone to talk to like she could back before Cici was born. He needed to spend time with his girlfriend or his relationship couldn’t possibly work. Despite what it might seem to others, she really did want the best for Jonathan and if he thought that Avery was the person who was going to make him happy then she wanted him to be with her. She'd feel horrible if he ended up alone because she was too clingy despite their relationship having ended romantically so many years ago. It was a quarter to ten according to the clock on the wall so it really was a surprise that someone would be coming over at this hour.
She expected for it to be someone that she knew and talked to often not her brother so she actually didn't believe it at first when she peeked out the peephole to see who was waiting outside the door. She always checked who it was to make sure that it wasn’t some crazed murderer or rapist waiting outside to chop her up or well sexually assault her and possibly kidnap her poor innocent daughter. You never know!
She fixed her pajama top before opening the door with a nervous expression, “Cooper? What's wrong? You never visit me especially at night. Shouldn't you be out having sex with a prostitute or selling drugs to innocent children?” She was being too snappy with him but she couldn’t help it. They hadn’t exactly left off on the best foot before but she still allowed him to come inside and get comfortable on her couch. She didn’t want to be rude or anything!
She sat down next to him before calling Cici into the room since she always loved seeing her uncle Cooper on the rare occasions when he was allowed to watch her. He was a horrible human being but he was somehow a wonderful uncle who truly loved his niece but who didn't love Cassidy? She was the sweetest kid ever even if she had been taught some questionable things for a five year old like to tell a teacher 'fuck you'.
Cassidy raced into the living room from her bedroom with her blonde pigtails bouncing up and down on her shoulders. She was clearly feeling better as she jumped into her uncle's waiting arms. “Big C!” She was soon telling him all about what he'd missed in her life including the details of her hospital stay albeit she dramatized it.
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Post by Jonathan Russel on Sept 27, 2012 20:29:44 GMT -5
Jon wasn't one who dealt with death in a particularly good way... mostly because he never really learned how. When his biological father died when he turned seven, he was sad, of course -- but all the events that occurred shortly afterward affected him in such a way that his father's death seemed more of something to be ashamed of rather than something you should mourn over.
At the news of Esme's father's death, Jon took it harder than he thought he would. He had actually developed a good, healthy father-son type of relationship with the man. Jon was definitely closer to him than he was his own father. He made him feel like he had an actual family, letting him in like that. Even after his and Esme's breakup. It filled that empty void that had developed the moment he saw his own father hanging in his closet years ago.
All Jon could think of to do was see Esme and Cici. After all, the man was Esme's dad, not Jon's, regardless of their close relationship. And they were the two who would understand how he was feeling right now. After having to man himself up in the mirror, Jon made the drive down to Esme's apartment, knocking on her door, and biting his lip, looking down as he waited for her to answer.
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Post by Esme Russel on Sept 27, 2012 20:41:53 GMT -5
Despite the fact that her father had just died, Esme still needed to take care of Cici. She wasn't really feeling up to cooking dinner with the death and the pregnancy thing so she had just ordered two pizzas - an extra cheese one because it was Cici's favorite and a pepperoni with bacon because it was her favorite. She hadn't really touched the pizza yet and Cici had only taken a bite before she resumed playing with the cat and watching movies. She was upset about the death of her grandfather as well but she was still able to have some fun and not cry. Which was the opposite of what her mother was doing who had curled up on the couch and was sobbing in the ugliest way possible. The apartment was quiet aside from the movie and Esme's sobbing so everyone heard the door and Hot Dog and Riley began barking as loudly as possible. Esme took a couple seconds longer than usual to get the door but she was grateful that she decided to answer it when she saw that it was Jonathan on the other end. She pulled him inside and held on to his body as tightly as she could without accidentally hurting him somehow. "Jon.... Jon.... Why did he have to go and die?" She was a mess, a pregnant overly emotional hysterical mess.
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Post by Jonathan Russel on Sept 27, 2012 21:24:55 GMT -5
Jon found himself clutching onto Esme tightly, as she pulled him into an embrace, the tears developing in his eyes being hard to fight through as he tried to rub her back in comfort, regardless of how upset he was himself. He only held her close, pursing his lips as a few stray tears rolled down his face. Jon was shaking his head, still unaccepting of what had happened, only whispering back, "I don't know, Es.." he buried his face into her shoulder, now fully aware that he was crying, and choked back a sob. Jon almost never cried. Ever.
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Blaine Welsh
New Member
My suits and my family are all that matter.....Maybe family more than the suits but shh don't tell
Posts: 12
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Post by Blaine Welsh on Sept 27, 2012 22:34:27 GMT -5
Esme was sobbing so hard that she was worried that she was going to run out of air; it was like her whole world was caving in around her and she didn't know how to save things and make this okay again. First Hudson then her dad and nothing was okay anymore. "Jon.... Please... Please...." She looked up into his eyes and chewed on the corner of her bottom lip, "Please stay with me tonight... We can be a family and we can.. we can run away just the three of us."
What in the hell was she thinking? "Please... Jon..." She was begging and she didn't even know what she was asking really. Run away as friends? Lovers? He could raise Hudson's baby? "Come on, it'll be fun!"
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Post by Jonathan Russel on Sept 27, 2012 22:59:02 GMT -5
Jon had wiped away some of his tears when he heard Esme suggest they run away... what? He scrunched his eyebrows as he looked down at her; she was begging, and he himself was too upset to think straight. But, run away? Fun? Jon shook his head, confused, furiously wiping away the tears that had been running down his cheeks. "Stay?" he asked, raising an eyebrow in inquiry, opening his mouth. Was he actually contemplating this? "Where.. where would we go? I don't... what?"
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